All posts tagged with: gay

There are so many great things that happen in the gay community – from volunteering and activism, to fundraising events and raising awareness. There’s no shortage of all the good work that happens on a daily basis. But as the gay community grows, we need to continue to celebrate and respect our diversity. Here’s the list of 10 things gay men need to stop doing:

1. Denoting queens. Drag Queens are the cornerstone of every gay community.
2. Describe yourself as “straight acting”. Don’t disrespect the gay community and pretend to be someone you are not or try to denounce being gay.
3. Trying to conform to the stereotypical gay man. Just be yourself.
4. Trying to be more “masculine”. Gay isn’t about being masculine or feminine, it’s about being you!
5. Use Grindr on multiple devices. If someone didn’t message you back, or blocked you on one device, take a hint. You’re not going to increase you chances by having multiple profiles. Besides, it’s a bit awkward for everyone when they see multiple pictures of you in a row. Are you self-obsessed, desperate, or just can’t find enough hook-ups?
6. Asking “are you clean”? Yes, I took a shower this morning after the gym and will have another before going out tonight. I think what you are asking is if I am HIV negative. If that’s what you really want to know, just say it. “What is your HIV status?” It’s the correct way to ask people and no misinterpretations.
7. Saying things are “too gay”. What the hell does that mean?
8. Fake tanning. It’s awkward to wake up in someone else’s bed having an imprint of your body stained on their 300 thread count sheets.
9. Hating other gay men. C’mon, it’s taken decades to get this far in equality… we don’t need to start hating amongst ourselves! That’s taking a step backwards.
10. Hating yourself. Love who you are and enjoy being you! You’re part of a strong, diverse community.

When most parents find out their child is gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgendered, their first reaction is usually emotional, followed by causes for concern. It’s natural for parents to want to protect their children from harm. But their #1 fear when their child comes out is almost always HIV/AIDS.

It can take a child weeks, months, or even years, to muster up the courage to come out. During that time, the child has asked themselves a lot of questions, to make sure that it’s the right thing for them to do. It’s a calculated risk, and not a conversation that is just brought up in casual conversation is most cases.

In the case of parents of gay sons, after they get over their initial emotional reaction of the new information, their thoughts tend to immediately fall towards one of the perceived #1 issues for gay men; HIV/AIDS. Even in recent blog posts with both my mom and my dad, they both admit that their major fears included HIV/AIDS.

It’s a legitimate concern; since the mid 1980’s, HIV/AIDS has had the highest infection rate between gay men. However, HIV/AIDS is not a disease limited to gay men.

For the past three decades there has been significant awareness and education programs targeted to reduce the spread and infection rates amongst the gay community. HIV/AIDS can be transmitted through a number of other ways including heterosexual sex, intravenous drug use, and blood transfusions, just to name a few.

Today, most gay youth and men understand the importance of practicing safer sex. It’s the way today’s generation is educated in school, online, and through social experiences. Condoms are readily available through community outreach programs, drug stores, and at many night clubs and bars. Condoms and sex are no longer taboo topics; it’s part of being a mature, sexually responsible individual.

While most individuals would prefer to remain HIV negative throughout their life, should they contract the virus, it’s no longer an immediate death sentence. A vast amount of research has been done over the past three decades, since the world epidemic was announced, and new drugs and treatments are being used with great success. Many men living with HIV/AIDS today lead very normal, healthy, active lifestyles.

Parents, when your child comes out to you, be there to support them on their journey. They will be scared, nervous, and be looking for your strength and encouragement. Reassure them of your unconditional love. The news may be shocking, difficult, or expected, but don’t immediately worry that your child being gay means that they will get HIV/AIDS and die. Those days are in the past. Embark on an education journey with your son to both learn about ways of practicing safer sex and the real facts and statistics on HIV/AIDS. You’ll be glad you did!

If you have questions about HIV/AIDS, visit the Positive Living Society of BC website. You can also make a financial contribution today to help them with their fundraising goal for the Scotiabank Half Marathon this June.

Photo Credit: Michael Anthony

Gay men love to travel and explore the world. Vacations can range from destination circuit parties and pride festivals, to beach holidays, hiking adventures and independent tours of countries overseas. Here are 11 quick travel tips for gay men to make your next gay travel adventure safer and more enjoyable:

1. Pre-plan your trip. Figure out what sites there are, events in the area during your stay, and the best places for nightlife, attractions, beaches, shopping, and food. You don’t want to show up and not have a plan or wonder what to do or where the gay village is.
2. Stay in the gay village. Or make sure you hotel is gay friendly. You don’t want to show up and find out that your hotel is on the other side of town as the gay village and that you’ll have to spend $25 in cabs every time you want to go out. Plus you’ll want to stay where you know it’s safe and you’ll be comfortable.
3. Use social networking to meet up with other locals; locals will show you the best places to visit, hang out at, eat, and drink.
4. Be aware. If you’re not familiar with the area of local customs, you could get yourself into trouble. Sadly, not all neighbourhoods are gay-friendly.
5. Don’t use paper maps. You become a target as an obvious tourist. It’s ok to use maps on your iPhone. Before leaving your hotel, get the directions and know the route.
6. Hang out a gay bars. Talk to the bartender and say hi to the locals. They’ll make sure you have a good evening and introduce you to other people with similar interests.
7. Pick up the local gay newspaper. It’ll be full of current events and things to do in the area.
8. Don’t pack a ton of crap. Gay’s are famous for over-packing. Face it, you don’t use half of it, plus you’re going to be shopping for new shirts and shoes anyway. Pack light leaving and come home full of new things.
9. Remember to take lots of photos. You don’t want to forget where you’ve been. Plus, if you meet some locals and become friends, you’ll want those memories. You just might meet up again.
10. Drink lots of bottled water. May people complain of being sick on vacation. Drinking bottled water keeps you hydrated plus it’s safer than drinking the local water, which your body isn’t accustomed to. You may also want to take an immune booster like Cold FX or Emergen-C.
11. Stay in contact. Most coffee shops and hotel lobby’s have free WiFi. It’s easy to send an email back home to let people know you are safe. If you have social media, post updates and photos. If something were to happen to you, at least there’s a trial of where you’ve been and what you’re up to next. Sadly, this also means that people know you’re not at home, so you also run the risk of a break-in at home while you’re away. It’s a catch 22, but I’d take the risk and share my travel experiences any time!

Earlier this week Canadian Blood Services announced they would be lifting the ban on gay men donating blood. It’s been a contentious issue in Canada, especially over the past decade as LGBT rights have progressed. While the 30 year old ban hasn’t been completely lifted, men who sleep with men (MSM), will be able to donate blood if they have been abstinent for at least five years will be allowed to donate blood.

Canadian Blood Services and Hema-Quebec received the approval on Wednesday from Health Canada. Health Canada consulted stakeholders for several years to develop the new policy. The primary concern was to keep harmful pathogens out of the blood supply.

The ban again MSM donating blood was instituted in the 1980’s when the Red Cross, who at the time was responsible for the supply of blood in Canada, recognized that HIV/AIDS was on the rise in Canada, and the untreatable disease could be contracted through blood transfusions.

After a public inquiry was held, the Red Cross was found guilty for not implementing adequate screening and testing procedures after hundreds of Canadians were infected with HIV and hepatitis C. The incident with the Red Cross cast a dark shadow over the organization for many years until they were replaced by the Canadian Blood Services, who is now responsible for the collection, testing, and management of blood in Canada. Given the history in Canada on blood safety, the changes have been a long and arduous process.

“So the message to them today is simply to bear with us,” said Dana Devine, vice president of medical, scientific, and research affairs at the Canadian Blood Services. “We are working toward attempting to make the opportunity for additional people to donate blood. We just aren’t quite there yet for that group of people.”

The new policy will allow men who have been raped by other men and men who have experimental sexual encounters with other men more than five years ago to now donate blood. The policy does not allow for men who are in long-term, monogamous relationships to be able to donate blood.

“I think it’s a step in the right direction regarding non-discrimination and stigmatization of gay men,” said Dr. Mark Wainberg, HIV researcher at McGill University and former president of the International AIDS society.

While this is a giant step forward in Canada, other countries such as Australia and the United Kingdom allow men who have not slept with other men for at least one year, and in South Africa it’s as short as six months. The United States still has a full lifetime ban, which was at the centre of attention at the 2012 LA Pride Festival.

“Mom, dad, do you have a moment? There’s something I want to tell you.”

Coming out is one of the scariest moments for gay people, especially youth. It’s full of emotion and takes a lot of strength and courage. Making the decision to come out is difficult and takes time.

Here are 10 questions you will want to think about and ask yourself before coming out:

1. Is it the right time? Make sure you are in a good emotional state, of sound mind, and in a comfortable position in life. You cannot predict how people will react and you need to be prepared that no matter the outcome that you are comfortable with those reactions and will be fine no matter the response. Ensure you have a stable foundation and have a clear mind.
2. Are you emotionally ready? It’s never good to come out after breaking up with someone or after the death of a loved one. Coming out takes everyone time to process the information and to adjust to the news. Do it at a time when people are in good spirits. If you’re coming out over Christmas, maybe not make it Christmas morning when opening presents, and definitely not after everyone has had a few too many rum & eggnog. After a Sunday barbeque dinner would be a good time, when everyone is relaxed and enjoying themselves.
3. Have you anticipated the questions you’ll be asked? Yes, there will be questions – many questions! Be prepared for questions and topics ranging from how do you know you are gay, to safer sex, to threats of bullying. Some questions you might be comfortable with, others might be more embarrassing or awkward. Regardless of the questions, always answer honestly. If you don’t know the question, see if you can look up the answers online, research the answer together, or agreed to get the answer and to get back to them in a reasonable amount of time.
4. Will you be able to remain calm? Emotions will run high! Expect everything from tears of joy to words of anger. Just remember to be calm and don’t over react. Refrain from shouting and insults if the conversation turns negative.
5. Can you support yourself? Make sure you have resources like a secure place to stay, money for food, and a safe place to go if you need someone to talk to afterwards. Youth may need to consider options of staying with another family member including aunts/uncles, grandparents, older siblings, or other extended family if it’s not safe to stay at home.
6. Do you have a support network? Youth should look to gay/straight alliances in participating schools, school counselors, or other peers in the community to reach out to if they have questions or need someone to talk to. Parents can access online resources or join a support group, like PFLAG.
7. Have you thought about how you want to come out? It’s not recommended to come out while intoxicated, in a moving car, or in a crowded, public location. Choose a private setting where you are comfortable sharing your news. Do it on your terms and don’t drag it out; get to the point, and quickly.
8. Who are you going to come out to? Sometimes it’s easier to come out to a friend or family member first. Start off by telling the most important person you can trust more important secret to. Predict their reactions. They can support you and help you with your emotions and to deal with your news. You don’t have to tell everyone at the same time. Do it as you feel comfortable.
9. Have you prepared for negative reactions? Sometimes people can get really angry. Have a plan to remove yourself from the situation, safely. Know who you can turn to for help and advice. Never allow yourself to get put into physical danger.
10. Are you proud of who you are? The equality movement has taken giant leaps forward in recent decades. Being gay is not considered to be bad. Peoples views are changing for the better. New laws and protection of equal rights are being implemented around the world. Understand that you are not alone. Many people have helped build a strong, safe community, so you can be comfortable and confident in who you are.

“Traveling around for work for five years straight, staying in different hotels gets tiresome and lonely,” explained 25 year old retired gay porn star, Travis Irons. “But, if I had to choose, then I guess I would say any of the W’s are nice.”

If you’re like Travis, and are bold, like to express yourself, and do it with class, style, and funk, then next time you’re in Atlanta, you’re going to want to book your stay at the W Midtown Atlanta.

The swanky property boasts sensational customer experience, fantastic views of the city, and rooms that will blow your mind. Not only is it totally up beat, but it’s also located just a few minutes walk from the gay village. You can’t go wrong.

From the moment you arrive, you’re welcomed into a surreal world, where the only thing that matters is you. As you drive up, you’ll be greeted by a team of attentive bellman and valet’s, ready to whisk you into the lobby so you can quickly get checked in, and off to your awaiting room.

The rooms are fabulous! Ranging from two-queens to two-bedroom suites, each room has a personality of it’s own. In true W Hotel style, bold colours mix pop against black and white backgrounds. The textures of fabrics, wall coverings, décor accents, chandeliers, and surfaces, all add to the visual and touch sensations throughout the room.

W Hotels rooms are for people who are confident. Why is that? Bathrooms aren’t tucked away in the corner. They are on display. The bedrooms have floor-to-ceiling glass rain-fall showers that peer right through to the bathroom. Speaking of bathrooms, the soaps, monogrammed linens, bathroom accessories are nothing more than amazing too; they make you want to scream out in excitement.

There’s nothing better than sliding into a king size bed with crisp white sheets, bolster pillows, and overlooking a view of the city. That’s exactly what you’ll find here. Even if you’re just wanting to lounge around, there is a chaise lounge calling out against the window, perfect for curling up with a book, watching the sunset.

If you’re in town and are entertaining a group, the parlor is set up with comfortable seating for a small crowd. Turn up the music from the in-suite sound system, order up a few items off the room service menu, and crack a bottle of Grey Goose, and you’ve got one hell of a party!

The hotel also has a gym in the lower level with both cardio and weight equipment. If you want to be pampered, Bliss Spa can take care of that. There is a whisky lounge inside the hotel, along with Spice Market, for modern fusion fare.

Relax. Enjoy yourself. Be you. The W Midtown Atlanta is exactly what you need to spice up your next visit to Atlanta!

For more information on exiting things to see and do, including gay-friendly restaurants, nightlife, and accommodations, check out Gay Atlanta.

Guest Room: ★★★★★

Bedding: ★★★★☆

Towels and Toiletries: ★★★★☆

Restaurants / Amenities: ★★★★★

Customer Service: ★★★★★

Overall Experience: ★★★★★

After saying goodbye to Los Angeles in 2012 and heading to Chicago, openly gay music singer, songwriter, and actor, Levi Kreis, was on a new path and excited for his future.

“My partner, his family, and the people I’ve come to know in Chicago enrich my life in a very authentic way,” Levi reflected on his move from California. “Resolving the years in L.A. and taking a huge risk into the unknown was right for me. It feels light to me.”

In February 2013, Levi released his latest single, So Much Better, with Vision 9 Records and UK label Enriched Records, followed by a mini-solo tour  promoting his latest works.

“I release my sixth album on June 20 call Imagine Paradise,” said Levi, explaining what he has in store for the rest of 2013. “In between all the hustle to promote new media, I’ll keep throwing myself out there for new acting roles.”

Recently Levi has shifted his outlook on life, releasing this fear of control.

“I feel more peace when I trust that something greater than myself is capable of guiding me to my most fulfilling life,” said the very religious songer. “I don’t know what that is, but I’m willing to sit in the question.”

Although deeply moved by spiritual powers, Levi looks inward on himself as his inspiration to continue to grow.

“I’m inspired in those moments where I feel the most distance from the opinions of others,” says Levi. “So much of my past has been controlled by an addiction to people pleasing. It has made my art impure and uninteresting at times, thinking if I did it like this, it would bring me approval by others. In those brief moments of self-empowerment, when my self-expression is untainted by the need for approval, those are the moments that inspire me the most. They grow me, because I then see pieces of me that I might not have seen before.”

It has taken Levi many years to scratch the surface of self-discovery, to put trust in others, and to abstain from what he and others would consider the evils of addiction, he leaves these words of advice for other artists…

“Happiness is not found in the attainment of some idolized accomplishment. It’s a choice. Right where you are. It’s within you, not without you.  Choose to be happy now. Chase nothing.”

Recently Travis Irons, who now goes by his real name, Derek, announced his retirement from the gay porn industry and to go back to school. He has a real passionate motivation for going back…

“I recently discovered a new passion in my life,” Derek explained. “I have always been a compassionate, sympathetic person, and sensitive to other people’s feelings; but recently I decided to do something about by making a career out of it.”

It’s a good move for the 25 year old, who has a keen sense of learning and genuine interest in human behaviour.

“I think I found my calling in psychology; for many reasons, a few being that I really find the human mind very intriguing,” said Derek. “I would love to have better skills in that area and to help treat, prevent, and diagnose those with mental illness because I feel that mental illness is a serious matter and one of the most looked over issues in America.”

It’s been a year of change for Derek, all with great intentions and achieving moments.

“Having the courage to change my life around by moving back home and getting in school, staying out of the club scene, and just staying focused on bettering my future,” said Derek.

While school is the priority this year, Derek is hoping he will still be able to get to a few events in 2013.

“I’m going to school full time; Summer, Spring and Fall,” said Derek. “I haven’t really planned any trips this year, but I was invited to London Pride, in June I believe, which might be a possibility.”

Coming out is never easy, no matter how old you are. It’s always difficult, full of fear and anxiety. Sure, it’s hard enough for most coming out to friends, coworkers, classmates, and family members. As hard as it is for the person coming out, it’s equally as hard for parents, especially mothers.

Parents always want the best for their children. They want to see them grow up, get married, and enjoy a successful career. But when their child comes up to them and says “Mom, Dad, I’m gay”, sometimes those dreams come to a shattering halt.

Fortunately for me, that wasn’t the case.

“When you were about a year old, you were bouncing up and down and you had the biggest smile on your face,” recalled my mom. “I had a sneaky hunch. I think he might be gay. I don’t know why. Mothers always know.”

My mom calls it Mothers Intuition. While I was growing up my mom always suspected I was gay, sighting signs from my behaviors to my social interactions.

“I was hurt because you didn’t tell me,” my mom said recollecting the first reaction she had after finding out I was gay. “I don’t know if you thought I wouldn’t love you any more, any less, or disown you. I was hurt. Not that you were gay, but because I didn’t hear it from you.”

I never came out to my mom directly. She found out through a series of events.

“When I actually found out a weight was lifted off my shoulders,” my mom explained. “He’s come into his own. He can live his life the way he wants to.”

My mom wishes she had been more open in discussing sexuality with me when I was growing up, and encouraged me to come out. Fortunately for me, that was not the case. Parents who suspect their child may be gay need to allow them to discover who they are for themselves. Today, there are many great resources available for parents – from PFLAG support groups to the vast amount of information that can quickly be searched on the internet, parents no longer need to wonder what they should do should they suspect their children might be gay.

Most importantly, having a strong, trusting relationship with your children will help break down barriers and increase communication on difficult subjects.

After dealing with her initial reactions to be coming out, my mom had a whole new set of fears facing her.

“Being from a small town, everyone knows everyone’s business,” my mom explained. “Being bullied, teased and being put down or being made fun of. I also worried when you started dating, because of HIV/AIDS. I still worry. I always worry.”

Parents are protective. It’s in their nature. Most parents would have these same reactions too. It’s how a parent outwardly handles their reactions which make the biggest impact.

“Be supportive for who they are and love them to death,” is my mom’s advice for any parent who’s child comes out to them. “They will need it. You got to have that support behind you. We give them the best tools for growing up, and teaching them right from wrong.”

My mom also suggests to parents to join a support group and do their own research online to help get the answers to their unanswered questions.

Coming out isn’t easy for anyone. Thankfully my mom was accepting, understanding, and supportive. Mothers need to remember that they love their children regardless of their sexual orientation.

Thank you mom for your emotional support and unconditional love over the years; it’s certainly helped me in evolving into the person who I am today!

The bond between a father and a son is really important. Fathers are proud to teach their sons life-skills and responsibility. Most fathers avoid talking about their emotions and feelings. But what is it like to be the father of a gay son? To find out the answer, I sat down with my own dad to find out what was on his mind.

“I’ve never distinguished you as being a gay son,” my dad explained, when I asked him what it’s like to be the father of a gay son. “I only you consider you my son.”

Over the years, my dad has played an instrumental role in my life. He is a mentor, someone I can go to for advice on any subject, and has shown his love and support for me unconditionally.

Growing up, my dad, like many parents, suspected I was gay, but never once asked or put any pressure on me to come out. I came out to my dad at the age of 19.

“I felt relief when you told me you were gay,” said my dad. “It wasn’t something I wanted to bring up. It was something I wanted you to tell me.”

His biggest fears and concerns when I came out were for my well-being. Awareness of HIV/AIDS, how my sexual orientation could impact my career, and being gay bashed were all at the top of his list.

“Love and respect your son for who they are and support them in any way you can,” is the advice my dad has for parents who have gay children. “It’s what helps the child out. It’s what a parent needs to do. Once you accept your son as gay, you have to accept all the challenges that will happen in your life too.”

Talking to friends, coworkers and family members, has always been difficult for my dad. He was never sure about how to bring it up and it made him uncomfortable, especially at the beginning. Now, he just tells people and doesn’t worry about what their reaction is.

“My biggest challenge is taking some of the ridicule and teasing and stereotypes of gay’s – both with the people I work with and people I meet and talk to,” said my dad. As a proud father he feels the need to step-in, to correct them, or stand-up for gay rights, which he says would be a full-time job in itself.

Fortunately, my dad understood being gay is genetic and had no impact on the way I was raised. He feels no shame or guilt, nor should any parent, who has a gay son. He’s proud of my personal life achievements as an individual.

Although my dad has not attended a pride parade, he would consider it. Heck, my dad’s even been to a gay bar!

With liberal beliefs, my dad is very supportive of the need for equal rights for all humans. He hopes over time people will be more accepting of all people, especially as younger generations grow up where sexual orientation is no longer an issue and just part of the norm.

My dad said it best when he said, “You can’t change the past. You can only go forward from here. I personally think we have a pretty good relationship.

You know what dad? I think we have a pretty darn good relationship too! Thanks for all your love and support.

After two months of an extensive renovation including lighting, sound and aesthetics, Vancouver’s landmark, Celebrities Night Club (1022 Davie Street), will re-open its doors on Tuesday, March 5, 2013.

The re-launch has generated a lot of conversation amongst Vancouver’s gay community. The nightclub has consistently been ranked as one of the largest gay night clubs in western Canada; however, the announcement of the renovations was vague in clarifying if the club would remain focused on the LGBT community, or if it would shift gears to attract a broader audience.

The reveal of the renovations have been closely guarded secret. Tuesday nights will remain open to all demographics, but most of the other nights are still under wraps.

Part of the mystery has been answered with the announcement of ICON. Produced by TFD Presents, ICON was launched last fall with much fanfare and enthusiasm from the Vancouver gay community. The event brought big name talent to the city including Manila Luzon, JuJuBee and Dominic Pacifico.

Throughout the month of March, Celebrities Nightclub and TFD Presents will host LIBERACE Thursday’s. Starting March 7, the doors will open at 10pm to a new night of fun and excitement to the remodeled nightclub.

The Thursday March 7 event will feature music by DJ Del Stamp and performances by local gay singer, dancer, and actor, Tyrell Witherspoon. Cover is $5 and highballs will be on spcial for $4.50.

Contest:

Enter for a chance to win two tickets to the opening night of TFD Presents LIBERACE Thursday’s at Celebrities Night Club. To enter, tweet:

I want to win two tickets to the opening of@TFDPresents #ICON #LIBERACE at @Celebrities_Van from @br_webb. http://ow.ly/ihqWn #WinLIBERACE

Once you have tweeted this contest you can receive up to four additional chances to win by doing the following:

1. Follow @br_webb on Twitter and leave an additional comment on this blog post confirming you are a new follower for an additional entry.
2. Leave a comment on this blog post of your best memory at Celebrities Night Club.
3. Share this blog post on Facebook and leave an additional comment on this blog post confirming you have shared on Facebook for an additional entry.
4. Subscribe to myWebbSite.ca and leave an additional comment on this blog post confirming you have subscribed for an additional entry.

Contest closes at 5:00pm PST, Wednesday, March 6, 2013. One random drawn winner will be announced on this blog post on or before Thursday, March 7, 2013. Read the complete contest rules.

Photo contributed

Recently, 26 year old gay porn star, Travis Irons, announced he would be retiring from the adult entertainment industry. His announcement was unexpected and caught many people by surprise.

“I think four and a half, almost five years, in the industry is long enough,” Travis said, as he described why he decided to end his adult entertainment career. “I had a good run and enjoyed it while it lasted, but enough is enough.”

Despite 2012 being a record year for Travis in terms of number of scenes he did and money he made, he says it just got old.

“I am so ready for the next chapter in my life, retiring Travis Irons,” Travis explained. “It’s time for Derek, my real name, to come out and shine for the person I am, which is more than a sex symbol. I want a relationship, a career, an education, and just to settle down and be happy.”

Despite his popularity as a adult entertainer, Travis felt he could not accomplish his personal goals while continuing in the industry.

“Travis was just an act, a made up name, a mask that I wore to entertain people, and satisfy others,” said Travis. “It’s time for ME now.”

Travis is now in school and working on an ambitious career path in the health field. Although Travis’s future goals do not include getting back into the adult entertainment in the near future, there’s always a possibility.

“I’ll be 30 in four years,” joked Travis. “Maybe I’ll do men over 30!”

Many agents and studio managers caution people who get in to the adult entertainment field, not to place their entire career path on staying in the industry forever, and to ensure they continue with their education and full-time work. Travis is a shining example of someone who has found success and made a conscious decision to part ways while he is ahead.

“I want to say thank you to everyone who made it possible to do this for so long,” proclaimed Travis. “I know that sounds cliché and super corny, but seriously. Thank you Howard and everyone at Fabscout who stuck with me through all the shitty times. Also thank you to all the amazing companies I worked with, my fans, my friends, the other models who could last as long as me and kept me relevant – joking! Thanks!”

Thank you Travis and best of luck on your future career and search for personal happiness! You will do well.

Pretty much everyone has an opinion and their own thoughts about the use of condoms in porn. Some argue it should be required, citing that it sets a good example for others, decreases transmission of STI’s and HIV, and it’s the responsible thing to do. On the other hand, others argue that it’s reality, it’s way hotter to watch, and porn is about fantasies and that’s what people want to see.

“Yes, bareback is hotter to me,” said Shane Frost, stating his views on the subject of safe sex vs bareback sex in gay porn. “Very rare will you find a model that does both.”

Most models will make a decision early on in their career if they are gong to perform safe on set. It’s a tough decision for some, and easy for others. It comes down to values, ethics, and where they want to go with their career.

“I find the mainstream condom porn pays more and you get much more exposure, as well as it being ‘safer’,” explained Shane. “More exposure means more scenes. More scenes means more money!”

And what about Shane’s personal views on the subject?

“If things in my personal life ever change, then who knows,” said Shane. “But for now, it’s mainstream porn for me. Do I watch BB porn? Guilty as charged!”

What are your views of bareback vs the use of condoms in gay porn? Leave a comment on this blog post.

Photo Credit: Express-Times File Photo

This week the National Executive Council of the Boys Scouts of America are continuing discussions on dropping the ban on gay scouts and gay troop leaders. Over 1.4 million people have signed the petition urging the organization to change their controversial and discriminatory practice.

It’s not just the public that is outraged. United States President Barack Obama and Eagle Scouts – Sen. Sherrod Brown of Ohio and Sen. Jeff Merkley of Oregon – LGBT leaders, and corporate partners are also asking for an end to the outdated policy.

“With LGBT people more visible and more triumphant than at any other point in our community’s history, the timing is right for the Boy Scouts to finally embrace gay scouts and gay troop leadership and put an end to this shameful policy,” said Rodney Scott, Board President of Christopher Street West. “Christopher Street West produced the world’s first LGBT Pride Parade in 1970 and this type of discrimination is precisely what compelled us to organize. We wanted equality in employment, education, housing and parity when it came to our relationships. Now, for gay youth and their families, we want equality in scouting.”

The Boy Scouts of America have been delivering programming including character development and value-based leadership training for over 100 years.

“Currently, the BSA is discussing potentially removing the national membership restriction regarding sexual orientation,” explained Deron Smith, Director of Public Relations for Boy Scouts of America. “This would mean there would no longer be any national policy regarding sexual orientation, and the chartered organizations that oversee and deliver Scouting would accept membership and select leaders consistent with each organization’s mission, principles, or religious beliefs. BSA members and parents would be able to choose a local unit that best meets the needs of their families.”

While the Boy Scouts of America would not dictate a position to units, members of parents, the policy would not require chartered organizations to act in ways inconsistent with the principles, mission or religious beliefs.

In other words, the individual organizations the oversee and deliver programming would determine how to address the situation.

It’s expected that the National Executive Council for the Boy Scouts of America will take up the issue today, Wednesday, February 5, 2013, and potentially vote on policy.

What do you think of The Boy Scouts of America policy banning gay scouts and troop leaders? Sound off now. Leave a comment on this blog post.

Last week, gay porn star, Shane Frost, shared thoughts on working in the porn industry. This week, Shane has advice for guys who are interested in getting into the industry, and want to know where to start.

“I really believe that one needs to have a good personality and a good head on their shoulders to make it in this business,” Shane explained. He also suggested that hiring a good agent can really help beginners and can hold your hand until you get to know the ropes.

“This is a tough, cut-throat business, especially when the cameras are off,” Shaned warned. “If one is not careful, they can get lost in it all REAL quick.” It’s solid advice, one that others, including Jayden Grey, have cautioned against before.

Shane has seen plenty of guys who may look hot with their six-pack abs and bulging biceps, but says that many don’t make it past their first year or two because they lack a good personality and common sense.

“I’ve been lucky to have a great boyfriend for almost four years that has kept me grounded and true to who I am as a person,” Shane said describing his success in the industry. “In a nutshell, stay true to yourself and who you really are. Don’t let fame, money, or whatever it is change who you are.”

Great advice Shane!

If you could ask a gay porn star for advice, what question would you ask, and who would you ask? Leave a comment below on this blog post.

It’s not unusual to wonder what it’s like being a porn star. Most people think it’s fun, glamorous and always full of excitement, which, there are definitely shining moments, but it’s actually pretty intense.

“Being in porn is not what one might think,” explains 30 year-old adult film star, Shane Frost. “One may think it’s just sex with hot guys. While this may be true, there is a lot of work that goes in to it.”

Models have to stay hard on set from six to eight hours at a time while on set. It’s not just you and your partner in bed on a random Wednesday night either. It’s early mornings and there are crew members controlling the camera, lighting and sound gear.

“You have to have camera awareness, as well as being aware of what you look like, what facial expressions you are making and what ones you should be making,” said Shane as he thought about things he has in mind while he is on set.

It’s more than just getting naked in front of a camera too. Throughout the shoot there will be times when you are ready and your partner is not, or vise-versa, or the camera crew is resetting, or the lighting is being re-worked.

“If you are both into each other, then, maybe the hot sex happens, after the scene is complete and you’re ‘washing up’ in the bathroom!” said Shane jokingly.

Shane has worked hard throughout his career in adult entertainment, which lead to his greatest personal achievement of winning two awards at the 2011 Grabby’s!

A few weeks ago, founder and owner of FabScout Entertainment, Howard Andrew, shared some great tips and advice on what recruitment agencies look for in new models who are interested in getting into the gay porn industry.

If you are going to get into the industry, and if an agent or studio decided they are interested in working with you, a question that comes up almost immediately is if you are a top, bottom, or vers.

What makes a good top?

“Someone who is genuinely a top,” Howard replied. “Not a faker and not a person with a small dick either.”

It’s can be very obvious on set if you claim to be a top and then not be able to get hard or aren’t interested in playing that role. It’s a bit investment to shoot a scene and expectations are high that you can perform when the direction calls “Action!”.

What makes a good bottom?

“Someone who likes it and can take it,” Howard summed up in just a few short words.

It’s also difficult to pretend to be a bottom. If you can’t relax or get into the role, it can delay or totally ruin a day of shooting. Howard also said it’s important for a bottom to be able to stay hard throughout the scene.

Photo contributed.

One of Vancouver’s largest and popular night clubs is about to undergo a massive renovation starting January 2, 2013. When complete, the transformed night club will be able to compete with other international clubs, attracting a whole new line-up of DJs and performers.

Since 1980, Celebrities has been part of the social fabric in Vancouver’s Davie Village. The club has primarily focused on the LGBT community, however, in recent years the club has started to evolve into a more diverse crowd and become less focused on attracting the gay dance crowd.

“We’ve seen Celebrities go through a lot of exciting changes over the years, but it’s been imperative to us that the heart and soul of Celebrities always remains the same,” explained Bill Kerasiotis, one of the owners that holds the license to the club, “With the core untouched, we’ve been able to ensure this cherished club experiences continued, ageless success.”

The announcement of the renovations is very vague when it comes to how the club will be positioned post-renovation. While the owners still want to appeal to the LGBT community, they also express that they want to open up the venue to attract a straight audience; something that has not been popular with the Vancouver gay community for many years.

“The goal of this revamp is to make Celebrities better than ever and to enhance what it’s come to be known for, and that’s namely amazing dance music within a superior club setting,” said Alvaro Prol, co-owner of Celebrities Nightclub. “It’s important that those who have supported us over the years know these improvements will only reflect and heighten that sentiment. We pride ourselves on being one of the best dance clubs on the West Coast, and want to ensure Celebrities continues to evolve over the years in order to live up to its name and legacy”.

Celebrities hopes to attract a higher caliber of DJs and performers after the renovation is complete, including Tiesto, David Guetta, Skrillex, Boy George and Ru Paul.

The club will outfitted with the latest technology, lighting, sound and aesthetics, and will unveil a new feature, which will remain under wraps until the club’s grand re-opening party in early February 2013. Celebrities will be announcing a brand new Saturday club-night that will launch with the club’s reopening.

Before Celebrities closes for renovations, there are a number of holiday parties lined up including Boy George and the annual New Years Eve celebration. Tickets are available for these events online.

What do you think of this announcement by Celebrities Nightclub? Sound off by leaving your comments below.

Many guys think that being a porn star is a dream job. But have you ever stopped and wondered what the average day-in-the-life of a porn star is really like?

“It isn’t all fun and games,” explained the owner of FabScout Entertainment, Andrew Howard. “The guys work hard, on their bodies and their persona. It isn’t easy.”

FabScout Entertainment is one of the largest managers of adult male entertainment and works with models, locations, studios, night clubs and events across the United States.

Not all potential models have to be a gym-jock with a six-pack or have the look of a twink. Yes, even average guys are needed too.

“There are different types of niches for every type of person,” said Andrew. “Of course a gym bod and abs are more sought after.”

Alright, having a sexy body definitely helps with getting a role, but what are agencies really looking for?

“I generally notice a good face first,” said Andrew as he described what he looks for when he is considering a new applicant. “To me, a body is important, but a face is what sells.”

If you are serious about getting into the adult entertainment business, you have to know that it’s not easy. Not everyone gets selected.

“A very small percentage,” stated Andrew, referring to the percentage of guys who get selected in the application process. “A lot of studios want new faces, new faces, new faces. So for some guys, they only get a few scenes; for some it is a few months, and for some it can last a while.”

Andrew also warns potential models that drugs, indifference, not following through, lack of photos and drama will all squash your chances of working with an agency or in the business.

It’s important for anyone who is considering getting into the porn industry to know that it’s not a life-long career move.

“We tell everyone to have a real job and to stay in school,” Howard said. “It’s not enough to live on… keep your day jobs boys,”

While some guys are lucky and have made some good money working in the porn industry, most have other full time jobs or gigs that they work on.

“And please understand it is out there,” cautioned Andrew. “People will find out. Your parents one day will find out. Don’t think you can always hide it.”

Andrew’s final advice to people interested in getting into adult entertainment are encouraged to communicate, be honest, and show mutual respect.

Gay is the key word that bonds the two types of people who stay at the Warwick Melrose Hotel in Dallas, Texas. Half smell like Bengay, and the other half are amazingly fabulous.

Located in the Oak Lawn district, the Warwick Melrose is a popular choice for many seniors visiting Dallas. This is because they enjoy the history of the building and because it is central to many of the city museums and attractions.

But the hotel is also located smack-dab in the middle of the gaybourhood. It is the only hotel in the area, making it the best choice for gay men wanting to stay close to the bars and night clubs, just steps away.

It’s not just the seemingly odd blend of customer demographics that has this hotel property confused. Apparently their designs are too. Many of the rooms are decorated in a French Empire theme, but Dallas doesn’t have a history of French settlement or influence. The odd vintage theme no longer fits in with the cosmopolitan neighbourhood that has grown up around it.

The hotel also underwent a number of upgrades and renovations. Many of these updates were cosmetic and done without preserving the true history of the building or without attention to detail. Doors and doorjams were not sanded before being painted, cheap imitation fixtures were poorly installed, and the beautiful elevator, original to the building, hasn’t even been adjusted to come to rest even with the floor when it opens in the lobby.

As if that wasn’t enough, the hotel staff, who are super friendly, are certainly not the best trained in the tourism industry. While they mean well, they lack basic skills of customer service and essential knowledge of the local attractions. It’s probably best to bring your iPad with you to do your own research and mapping – at least the hotel offers free WiFi!

If you are hungry, there is a lovely looking lobby bar and restaurant on site. Again, bring your iPad because it’s super dark and you might not be able to read the menu. Then again, if you can’t read the menu, then you probably can’t read the dinner bill, so you’ll probably under pay for dinner… which could save you a few bucks!

In all fairness, if you are going to Dallas and are looking for a half-decent place to stay  that is inviting, offers a relatively safe environment and is easy on the pocket-book, the Warwick Melrose is a good choice. Just don’t go getting in an argument with one of the seniors over gay-marriage in the hotel lobby.

Guest Room: ★★★

Bedding: ★★★★

Towels and Toiletries: ★★

Restaurants / Amenities: ★★★

Customer Service: ★★

Overall Experience: ★★★